Well, today's a Friday and I am really tired. After an attempt to make chocolate cheesecake, including running to and fro from shop to shop purchasing the ingredients halfway through the recipe, I must say, evaporated milk should be placed in the dairy section, coz that's technically what it is. If I may quote myself for further elaboration: Halfway through making the cheesecake batter, I realized I didn't have cheese.

Superficially, things aren't that bad, I suppose. Chinese homework to be completed by Sunday (yes, the whole thing, including the 10 articles), a pile of plates and bowls on the side of my table each adorning sweet delicacies at a certain point in time, dozens of books to read and I don't give a damn. All's well in my temporarily disheveled den.

Although.

I feel somewhat empty. Its the reason I close my eyes when I hug my bolster at night. Its the reason I wrap my blanket around me even though it isn't cold.

Sigh.

What do I want, I really don't know. I'm trying so hard to bring back what I had tried so hard to forget. And for what?

If you want to move on with your life and place everything behind, please just deliver me a coup de grâce. The possessiveness and jealousy I used to have is now replaced by a gaping maw, an empty void, and I don't know if its a good or a bad thing. It tells me I want to see your face again, and hear your voice calling my name again, but-

ARGH.

..I need to think.

Azazyl

Stench of humanity,
The rot of those fair.
Despair!
Of lost sanity and
Dreams never there.