There it is
Go on do it
No don't its stupid
You can't its too risky
I want to do what I feel is right
We need to talk
No not today another time
Again.
There is always tomorrow
That's what you told me nine months ago
And you believed it and it took you here
What am I to do
I don't know
What day is it, and in what month
All the times I thought couldn't get worse
Since the start of it all
Yes it has now
Even though the feelings have changed one fact remains constant
Yet the feelings are still changing
I can see you from across the room, there's a tear in your storied eye
We have been on board the emotional rollercoaster
And through the entire journey the wind has blown my words away

For taking your care all this while for granted
for not realizing it until you gave up
for the constant bullying and unintentional rejections back then
for being insensitive and over possessive
for not talking to you because i felt jealous
for making it hard on you all this while
for spite-ing you because i felt terrible
for blowing things out of proportion
for making you cry
for spending so many blog posts lamenting one-sidedly
for making empty promises and giving false hopes
for being some childish melodramatic fool
for not being there when you felt sad
for not considering what it was like to be you
for pretending like i didn't care
for not having the courage to confess
for not having the courage to say anything
for being too late

i

Azazyl

Stench of humanity,
The rot of those fair.
Despair!
Of lost sanity and
Dreams never there.