Ignoring, for now, the fact that for once in a long time, I broke the strict format of a DT blogpost.

And ignoring, for now, the fact that my Aztec pyramid now gleams with a coating of Pearl Gold.

I'm seriously screwing up my life. All my companions are leaving me. Everyone is starting to grow distant. My best friends are starting to drift away. I seriously don't know why. I guess I'm just. Failing at everything.

I'm just so, so tired right now. I want to sleep but I can't. I want to lie down but I can't.

I just wanted to.

Smile and mean it.

Perhaps. Waiting forever is not an answer. Hiding from it isn't an answer either. Its just the avoiding of it. Perhaps I'm a coward, I flee. And at the very end, the answer is just a matter of wrong or right.

I saw you run away. How long are we going to avoid the answer?

Okay, fine lor. Just tell me when you wanna come back or you're ready or something. I don't know what else to say. I hope, I wish, I pray but to no avail. I really don't know what else I can do.

Maybe in a few days time I'll look back on this post and think twice and then post something again, but that's the way I am. I am me, and I refuse to change.

And I know that nothing can come of nothing.

But what have I asked?

We rise with noble intentions.
And we risk all that is pure.
We are only as great as our hearts will allow.

And what risk can you possibly take. What have you got to lose. Nothing. You know what I think and what I feel in and out, the exact opposite of what I know of you. Bloody hell, I seriously don't know. I really don't.

Except that when you smile.

Okay, I'm seriously tired. I'll just. Go.

Azazyl

Stench of humanity,
The rot of those fair.
Despair!
Of lost sanity and
Dreams never there.